It's All About the Zoe

My baby brother

8:35 PM, Wednesday 25 February 2009 .. Link

Mommy said I should post something so this doesn't disappear! So she is helping me.

My baby brother is getting huge! I can't call him my little brother because at 6 months old, his head is bigger then my whole body!......and he is still growing!

He is slowly outgrowing the name "dammit" He is answering to Rufy now. Mommy has to yell it about 20 times before he finally pays attention to her, but he is learning his name. He doesn't potty in the house anymore. He knows to bark at the door to go out. I learned the hard way not to stand under him when he is outside...yep he did what you think he did. I was glad Mommy gave me a bath. I usually don't like baths, but I really hate getting peed one!

My older brother Willy isn't feeling very well. He has gotten really fat this winter and even though Mommy and Daddy have put him on a diet and try to get him to run and play fetch to keep off the winter weight it isn't working. They are worried about his weight gain and the fact that he is already nine years old. I have heard them say things like "If he doesn't lose some weight he is going to explode" and "his little heart can't take the strain of all that weight" I even heard them say one night that they don't think he will be with us next winter.
They said that about Schmergan, and he isn't with us any more. I hope they are wrong. Willy is my big brother and he watches out for me and cleans my face and snuggles with me when it is cold in the house.

Meet my new baby brother

11:18 AM, Saturday 22 November 2008 .. Link

This is my new baby brother. He doesn't have a name yet. Mommy and Daddy are still trying to think of one.

Mommy said they should name him Einstein because he already knows to go to the back door when he has to go potty. I don't know what the big deal is...he can't do any of the things I can do...like shake, lay down, sit or give "please pleases". That's when I sit up on my back legs and wave my front paws at mommy. I do that when she has something i want....like pizza!

Willy says being a big brother takes a lot of work. He has to play with the puppy and clean his ears. They played with the toys last night and fell asleep on the floor.

I think Willy got a head ache after all the running around:

This morning we taught the puppy a new game:

We call it "Chase the kitty"

After we were done playing it was time to take a nap.

I'm still not to sure about this whole "baby brother" thing. He is a moose. Mommy even said that was his name at his old house...Moose, because he was the biggest puppy in the litter. He is almost three times my size!

Mommy says I will always be her baby. So I'm not to worried about this new brother....but he better not mess with my toys or I will have to rough him up!

My big adventures

5:06 PM, Sunday 16 November 2008 .. Link

Yesterday I went for a car ride in the big truck. Just Mommy, Daddy, Willy and me. I like it when we take the truck. Daddy drives and Willy sits in the middle and Mommy holds me in her arms. I can rest my chin on her arm and look out the windows as the world goes zooming by.

Sometimes we are along side another car and all I have to do is growl...and they go away! I'm sure they are afraid of me.

Yesterday Mommy and Daddy went into a store and left me an Willy in the truck to guard stuff. Willy and me would bark whenever anyone got to close to our truck. I saw a lady laughing at us...she wouldn't have been laughing if we could have gotten the door open. I would have bit her for getting to close to mommy's stuff!

When Mommy and Daddy came back to the truck I got so excited! They had a big bag....fun stuff comes on big bags! I was so excited I couldn't control myself. Daddy opened the truck door and I was wagging my tail so hard I fell right off the seat and out into the parking lot!

It was kind of scary! Daddy was yelling at me to come to him, but I was afraid I did something wrong so I wanted to run to Mommy, but I couldn't find her. I went under the truck to see if she was on the other side and there where all these cars driving by really fast! I didn't know where I should go...then I saw Mommy crawling on the ground like she does when we play with the toys....so I ran up and jumped in her arms! She gave me a big hug and scolded me for running around. I won;t do that again!

Then today Daddy was taking us outside and there where these really big ugly birds on our pond! I chased them away! Mommy was yelling at me again...she really needs to chill out! Daddy was running down the hill with us. He looked like he was having fun...and he looked silly in his PJ's and slippers!

I got in trouble this afternoon too. Mommy had a basket of laundry. It was all warm and smelled nice. It looked like the perfect place for me to hide the piece of pig ear she gave me earlier. I didn't want to eat it right away and I didn't want Willy to get it...so I hid it in the laundry basket. I only chewed it up a little, it wasn't like I was the cat and puked up a hairball in the laundry!

Tonight Mommy and Daddy are going to watch a movie. I think I will try to be good and just lay in the blankets with them. Maybe they will have chips and drop some!

Tail wags and kisses!
Zoey!

Writing for mommy

12:41 PM, Saturday 25 October 2008 .. Link

Hey all! Just thought I would drop a line to let you know my Mommy has not fallen off the face of the earth!

Our computer went to the big scrap heap in the sky...aka Best Buy Geek squad and is being repaired.

Since Daddy HAD to get on line to do his fantasy football picks and mommy had to pay some bills....they went to the Library and got library cards so they could use those computers.

Some how Mommy can't remember her user name and password so she had to use mine!

So if you have not figured it out yet....LMC is my Mommy!

Since this is my blog (Zoey) I let her use it !

She said to tell everyone the new job is going great. She misses everyone and hopes to get her computer back soon!

Until then...

Tail wags and Kisses!
ZOEY

How to clean the toilet

11:09 PM, Friday 1 August 2008 .. Link

1. Put both lids of the toilet up and add 1/8 cup of pet shampoo to the water in the bowl.

2. Pick up the cat and soothe him while you carry him towards the bathroom.

3. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close both lids.

You may need to stand on the lid.

4. The cat will self agitate and make ample suds. Never mind the noises that come from the toilet, the cat is actually enjoying this.

5. Flush the toilet three or four times. This provides a "power-wash" and rinse".

6. Have someone open the front door of your home. Be sure that there are no people (or dogs) between the bathroom and the front door.

7. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly lift both lids.

8. The cat will rocket out of the toilet, streak through the bathroom, and run outside where he will dry himself off.

9. Both the commode and the cat will be sparkling clean.

I'm a good girl!

9:29 AM, Wednesday 4 June 2008 .. Link

I'm a good girl.....daddy says so!

This is the original version of the song:

Here is how daddy sings it to me:

She’s a good girl,loves her mamma, loves cook-ies, and her daddy too.
She’s a good girl, crazy ‘bout Willy, loves Schmergan, and her car rides too.
And it's a long day, staying’ in the basement, She would rather be, runnin’ thru the yard
And I’m a sad dad, ‘cause I really miss her, I’m a bad dad, for not letting her run........

I like it when daddy sings to me!

Jsut blogging so it doesn't disapear!

9:56 AM, Tuesday 6 May 2008 .. Link

Not much to bark about. The weather is warmer so mommy lets me play in the sunshine. My brother Willy and I have been finding stinky dead fish in the yard. They are a blast to roll in. Mommy doesn't seem to happy about it. After we come in from playing all day she tries to drowned us. She calls it "bath time" I call it torture!

Since the weather is nicer we get my favorite bed time treat..."Tick Check!" That's when mommy says "Tick check!" and we roll over on our backs, she scratches us all over and wiggles her fingernails into our fur. I love it! Except when she finds ticks, then she kind of pulls my hair and then burns them! mommy can be kind of violent with those little buggers! She says they can make me sick if they are left on, so it's Ok if it hurts to make them go away.

Mommy gave me a hair cut. She says she wants to put a picture of it here and keeps asking me to leave the ribbons n my hair.....I hate ribbons, there so girly! By the time she gets back to me with the camera I have them pulled out. Willy ate the last one she put in my hair, maybe now she will quit trying it!

Hope you all have a fun day!

Tail wags and Kisses
ZOEY

What I want for my Birthday

4:50 PM, Tuesday 18 March 2008 .. Link

I have been checking out the toys at the pets store and I can't find anything I want for my Birthday. I'll be 4 on April 11th!

I found this on the internet....I wonder how mommy uses tht credit card thing?

A Dogs New Best Friend

This is being called the AFLAC Scam

10:02 AM, Saturday 15 March 2008 .. Link

Police say that the gang usually is comprised of four members, one adult and three younger ones.

While the three younger ones, all appearing sweet and innocent, divert their 'mark' (or intended target) with a show of friendliness , the fourth -- the eldest -- sneaks in from behind the person's back to expertly rifle through his or her pocket or purse for any valuables.

Be on the alert!!

Scroll down to see a photo from a recent attack that was captured on film..

Sorry blond readers!

2:28 PM, Tuesday 12 February 2008 .. Link

Daddy found this picture and said. "That must be the canine version of a blond!"

I'm kinda blond (after I have a bath). But when I chewed on the flash light I don't remember seeing light come out of MY back end!...I must not be a "true" blond.

Words of wisdom

10:16 AM, Sunday 27 January 2008 .. Link

I found this note taped to the wall right in front of my food dish! I think Mommy is trying to tell us something.

Dear Dogs and Cats,

The dishes with the paw print are yours and contain your food. The other dishes are mine and contain my food. Please note, placing a paw print in the middle of my plate and food does not stake a claim for it becoming your food and dish, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest.

The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack. Beating me to the bottom is not the object. Tripping me doesn't help because I fall faster than you can run.

I cannot buy anything bigger than a king sized bed. I am very sorry about this. Do not think I will continue sleeping on the couch to ensure your comfort. Dogs and cats can actually curl up in a ball when they sleep. It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other stretched out to the fullest extent possible. I also know that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out the other end to maximize space is nothing but sarcasm.

For the last time, there is not a secret exit from the bathroom. If by some miracle I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary to claw, whine, meow, try to turn the knob or get your paw under the edge and try to pull the door open. I must exit through the same door I entered. Also, I have been using the bathroom for years -- canine or feline attendance is not required.

The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough!

To pacify you, my dear pets, I have posted the following message on our front door:

To All Non-Pet Owners Who Visit & Like to Complain About Our Pets:

1. They live here. You don't.
2. If you don't want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture. (That's why they call it 'fur'niture.)
3. I like my pets a lot better than I like most people.
4. To you, it's an animal. To me, he/she is an adopted son/daughter who is short, hairy, walks on all fours and doesn't speak clearly.

Remember: In many ways, dogs and cats are better than kids because they:
1. Eat less
2. Don't ask for money all the time
3 Are easier to train
4. Normally come when called
5. Never ask to drive the car
6. Don't hang out with drug-using friends
7. Don't smoke or drink
8. Don't have to buy the latest fashions (we will make an exception for Zoey)
9. Don't want to wear your clothes (unless you are DeeJay's Beagle)
10. Don't need a 'gazillion' dollars for college.

And finally,

11. If they get pregnant, you can sell their children.

Don't judge a dog by it's breed.

8:56 AM, Monday 21 January 2008 .. Link

I usually don't do these kind of things, but since my cousin Oppie is a pit bull I thought i would post this for him. Most people are afraid of him when they first meet him just because of what he is. I know he is very gentle and so are a lot of others like him....

Please don't judge a dog by its breed! It's the human that makes the dog what it is.

Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

10:36 PM, Friday 18 January 2008 .. Link

I'm sure glad I'm a girl dog. I hear it is so cold out that when a boy dog lifts his leg to pee on the fire hydrant he freezes too it!

Done with pictures

9:20 AM, Thursday 10 January 2008 .. Link

This is a little story done with pictures...hope you enjoy it!

Tail wags and kisses,
Zoey

Once upon a time there was a crazy dog. He would fight with any one...including himself!

He was such a mean dog that we didn't know what to do. I tried to call the doctor to find out what to do but they put me on hold

After a while I gave up and told them to call me back. I will sit and wait for the phone to ring

When they called back they said it was hopeless....just tell him when he fights to pick on some one his own size

After I heard that i was happy! Since i am just a little thing he won;t pick on me....now i can rest easy

The End!

I'm sorry!

That was just plain silly!

My Christmas and New Year's Eve

11:05 AM, Tuesday 1 January 2008 .. Link

I hope every one had a great Christmas and a safe new year! Mommy has been busy so she didn't have time to help me write.

I had a great Christmas. we went to look at Christmas lights and when we got home Santa had been here! There were all kinds of presents under the tree. Willy, my brother, helped open most of mine.

Santa gave me so many toys I didn't know what one to play with first.

Even my big brother Schmergan got presents. It was his 13th birthday the day after Christmas:

Mom and Dad had all kinds of good food to eat while we opened presents. All we had to do was say please..... and they gave us yummy stuff.

We all ate until we had tummy aches! I think Willy is about to explode!

I hope everyone had a safe New Year!

We laid around and watched TV. Then all of a sudden my mom and Dad started counting....10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1!

They kissed each other then scooped me up and kissed me! Mommy danced around the living room with me and then patted Willy on the head! Schmergan slept thru the whole thing!

I couldn't think of a better way to start the new year then to be with the ones I love!

Merry Christmas. A card to you from me!

8:05 AM, Monday 17 December 2007 .. Link

I wanted to send everyone a Christmas card, but I just couldn't get the hang of licking the stamps without eating them. The glue on the envelopes is quite tasty too!

So I will have to send my cards this way.

Click here to see my card to you.

Merry Christmas!
Tail wags and Kisses,
Zoey

My Christmas wish

10:41 AM, Thursday 13 December 2007 .. Link

I wish dogs could go into theaters.

Click on THIS to see what movie I am barking about!

I would like to see this movie. Maybe Santa will put it in mommies Christmas stocking! Then I can watch it all curled up in her lap. I know it will make her cry so I want to be nearby to give her puppy kisses!

Don't bite the reindeer!

8:38 AM, Wednesday 12 December 2007 .. Link

Why us dogs should not bite Santa's reindeer........

I think my parents are loosing their minds!

10:51 AM, Wednesday 5 December 2007 .. Link

My mommy and daddy are doing some really weird stuff.

They put this weird looking tree in our living room. It's not even real (I know because I nibbled on a branch and it was made out of plastic!). They put all these pretty lights on it and other things that hang on it and dangle. Kitty likes to play with them but when he does mommy yells at him.

Mommy also put this table up with little houses on it.....just between you and me....I think mommy is a bit to old to be playing with dolls. She keeps rearranging things in this "village" as she calls it.

I'm worried that they might be going senile....I heard about this on Dr Phil. (mommy leaves the TV on for us when she goes to work).

I also see mommy hide things in the closet. I was sure I saw a toy go in there....mommy knows we like to play with our toys right away when she brings them home....I hope she doesn't get forgetful too and forget she put them in there.